The Junk Mail (season 9, episode 5)

written by Spike Feresten, directed by Andy Ackerman
original airdate: October 30, 1997

Kramer cancels his mail. Jerry’s old friend “Fragile” Frankie gives him a van. Kramer offers Anthony Quinn’s t-shirt in exchange for the van. George’s parents rekindle their romance. Elaine meets the man of her dreams but wants to keep Puddy on hold. Wilford Brimley guest stars.

FEATURED LOCATIONS

The Improv is not featured in this episode.

Jerry’s Apartment
Jerry announces he’s getting a new car from “Fragile” Frankie Merman, and Kramer offers to help him sell the “big, juicy” van he ends up getting. Jerry gleefully reveals to Elaine that her new man is “The Wiz.” George comes up with a plan so his parents cannot let him go, while Kramer announces a vendetta against the postal service.

Monk’s Café
Elaine meets a guy who she discovers is the pitchman for “The Wiz” – she dumps Puddy for him, but then Puddy refuses to take her back later. George devises his plan so his parents will catch him “dating” his cousin.

George’s Apartment
George makes his weekly call to his parents, only to learn he’s being ignored by them.

Costanza House
Frank and Estelle try to cut George loose by ignoring him, not vice versa. George later goes to the house to look for Chinese leftovers, and ends up waiting to catch them in the act of skipping out on him.

Fortunoff’s (NOW CLOSED)
3 W. 57th St., New York, NEW YORK (map)
nearest subway: 5th Avenue – 59th Street (N,Q,R)
George tries using a “you were right about” with Frank in regards to Fortunoff’s, but gets abruptly cut off and hung up on.

Omaha Steaks
10909 John Galt Blvd., Omaha, NEBRASKA (map)
In venting about stopping the mail to Elaine and Jerry, one of the guilty companies that Kramer blames for over-sending catalogues is Omaha Steaks.

Pottery Barn
1965 Broadway, New York, NEW YORK (map)
nearest subway: 66th Street – Lincoln Center (1)
Kramer drops off all of his junk mail back here…to a very non-confrontational response. The closest location to Kramer’s Apartment is here.

NEW JERSEY (map)
Jerry announces that he will try and sell the van from Frankie to a lot in New Jersey, and invites Kramer to go with him to the lot.

United States Postal Service
93 Fourth Ave., New York, NEW YORK (map)
nearest subway: 14th Street – Union Square (4,5,6)
Kramer causes a conundrum for Newman, when he tells the post office to stop sending him mail altogether. Kramer later gets grilled by Postmaster General Henry Atkins for refusing to take his mail.

The Wiz (NOW CLOSED)
49 W. 45th St., New York, NEW YORK (map)
nearest subway: 47-50th Streets – Rockefeller Center (B,D,F,M)
Elaine dates Jack, who has a “magical” face…but only because he’s The Wiz’s TV spokesperson. The other locations shown on commercial include 40 Carmens Rd. (Massapequa), 39-11 Main St. (Flushing), 89-22 Queens Blvd. (Rego Park) and 49 W. 45th St., which is closest to the gang in Manhattan.

New York Magazine
75 Varick St., New York, NEW YORK (map)
nearest subway: Canal Street (1)
Elaine mentions that her new boyfriend Jack (a.k.a. “The Wiz”) works as a fact checker here.

Bolo (NOW CLOSED)
23 E. 22nd St., New York, NEW YORK (map)
nearest subway: 23rd Street (N,R)
George takes his cousin Rhisa out on a date here to try to “start” a relationship with her, thus upsetting his parents…but Rhisa ends up liking the idea.

Central Park
New York, NEW YORK (map)
Kramer tries trading Jerry’s new van for Anthony Quinn’s undershirt, which he claims he stole from Quinn in the park while he was doing situps. Jerry tries tracking down Fragile Frankie Merman in the park, who frantically digs a hole over his disappointment with Jerry’s reaction to the van. George drives his cousin Rhisa out here to get caught by his parents, but they end up catching his parents in a lewd act.

JoJo
160 E. 64th St., New York, NEW YORK (map)
nearest subway: Lexington Avenue – 63rd Street (F)
Elaine goes for dinner with Puddy, where he berates her for dumping him over a TV pitchman, and tells her he’s not taking her back.

WASHINGTON, D.C. (map)
Postmaster General Atkins tells Kramer he drove to New York from D.C., and had to cancel a golf game with the Secretary of State.