MONK’S CAFÉ (actually Tom’s Restaurant)
2880 Broadway, NEW YORK, NEW YORK (map)
The gang’s hangout away from Jerry’s Apartment, the coffee shop, for the entire series.
nearest subway: 116th Street – Columbia University (1)
Monk’s Café does NOT appear in the following episodes: “The Seinfeld Chronicles,” “The Stake Out,” “The Jacket,” “The Revenge,” “The Chinese Restaurant,” “The Pen,” “The Parking Garage,” “The Café,” “The Stranded,” “The Suicide,” “The Fix-Up,” “The Limo,” “The Good Samaritan,” “The Letter,” “The Parking Space,” “The Wallet,” “The Watch,” “The Opera,” “The Airport,” “The Movie,” “The Implant,” “The Handicap Spot,” “The Puffy Shirt,” “The Glasses,” “The Bris,” “The Non-Fat Yogurt,” “The Cigar Store Indian,” “The Dinner Party,” “The Hamptons,” “The Mom And Pop Store,” “The Highlights Of 100,” “The Package,” “The Dealership,” “The Puerto Rican Day” and “The Chronicle.”
Seasons: One • Two • Three • Four • Five • Six • Seven • Eight • Nine • Curb • CICGC
Monk’s Café’s first appearance of the series. George compliments the coffee shop’s bathroom mirrors, saying how he looks like Robert Wagner when he looks in it.
Jerry is forced to “dump” an old childhood friend, Joel Hornick, after growing tired of his childish antics and his generally irritating personality.
“The Stock Tip”
George celebrates his stock’s success, smoking a cigar and gloating about a new car he purchased, much to Jerry’s dismay.
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Jerry meets with Marlene here shortly after she breaks up with George. He later confesses to seeing Marlene, which George declares he really has no issue with Jerry and Marlene dating.
“The Pony Remark”
Jerry contemplates with George and Elaine whether to play in his softball championship (George: “We need you! You’re hitting everything!”) or attend Manya’s funeral (Elaine: “He has to go! He may have killed her!”).
“The Phone Message”
George reveals his plan to erase any evidence of his phone message – get Jerry into the apartment and swap out the tape.
Jerry tells George about his error in trying to get Elaine the unit above him, which begins the epic argument between the two over which is truly the bigger idiot.
Trying to get more information about Ray’s duplicate statue of Jerry, Jerry invites him to the coffee shop, with George nearby to “spy” on Ray. This is also the first time the coffee shop is explicitly referred to as being called “Monk’s.”
“The Heart Attack”
George is convinced he is having a heart attack at Monk’s, after watching a TV program the night before about coronaries. In true George fashion, he still manages to argue his check before leaving for the hospital.
Jerry breaks the news of his and Elaine’s “deal,” but doesn’t want to divulge. George’s response: “You ask me to have lunch, tell me you slept with Elaine, and then say you’re not in the mood for details. Now you listen to me. I want details and I want them right now. I don’t have a job, I have no place to go. You’re not in the mood? Well you get in the mood!”
“The Baby Shower”
After George describes Leslie as the worst date of his life, Elaine asks if she can use Jerry’s apartment to host a baby shower for her, as Jerry will be out of town doing shows.
Elaine and George lament over their situations, taking care of Ed and Pequita, respectively, while Jerry compliments a busboy.
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The gang spots Joe DiMaggio at Monk’s, dunking his donut in his coffee, proving Kramer’s Dinky Donuts story to be true.
George dumps his girlfriend Patrice, taking her request to give her the “truth,” upsetting her to the point of being institutionalized.
George and Elaine visit the coffee shop without Jerry, discovering they have nothing in common except for sharing stories about Jerry.
George tells the gang about Mr. Hayman’s high school antics (including giving George a wedgie and calling him “Can’t-stand-ya”), and Jerry later meets classmate Sherry Becker to discover the truth about what happened to “Tropic Of Cancer.”
Elaine confesses to George that she left the message on Jerry’s tape recorder as a joke.
“The Nose Job”
George desperately tries to avoid looking at Audrey after her botched nose job (for which he later confesses he is likely going to hell for), but is floored when she reveals her new nose after seeing Kramer’s surgeon.
“The Alternate Side”
Elaine reveals that Owen has recovered (and admitted to just using her for sex), and Kramer tells the gang he was fired from the Woody Allen movie for botching his only line, and inadvertently getting glass in Woody’s eye after smashing a beer glass on a bar.
“The Red Dot”
George confesses to Jerry that he had sex with the cleaning woman on the desk in his office, later throwing up from drinking Hennigan’s (“good thing the cleaning lady was there”).
After being split up on various adventures across the city, the gang reunites at Monk’s…including George, wearing only a hotel bed sheet, after having his suit and wallet stolen.
“The Pez Dispenser”
Jerry tells the story of how Kramer may have driven Richie to drugs, and George pre-emptively breaks up with Noel, much to her shock and dismay.
Jerry obsesses over Keith’s signals (or lack thereof) to Elaine and George, stunned at feeling this way over a man. George confesses that his life’s ambition is to sleep with a very tall woman.
Kramer and George meet at the coffee shop to exchange keys, where George describes his yearning and “constant craving” to Kramer. George later meets Jerry to give him Elaine’s spare key, leading to a physical struggle over Jerry getting her keys.
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“Olympic Moments & Facts”
Jerry has a number of “Olympic Moments” at the coffee shop with George and Kramer.
Jerry tells George about Kramer’s cameo on “Murphy Brown,” and invites him to join him in California when he goes to appear on “The Tonight Show.”
“The Pitch / Ticket”
Jerry and George have their landmark discussion about developing “a show about nothing,” before Jerry goes off on George for sinking the idea immediately by storming out of NBC over his “artistic integrity.” They are later trapped inside Monk’s, with Crazy Joe Davola laying in wait outside for them, shortly after kicking Kramer in the head.
“The Bubble Boy”
Jerry meets Mel Sanger, a Yoo-Hoo delivery man, and takes him up on his offer to visit his son Donald on his birthday, who is a fan who lives in a bubble.
“The Cheever Letters”
Jerry divulges the details of his night with Sandra to George, including the aftermath of the infamous “panty remark.”
Jerry and George argue over George’s desire to break up with Susan, as it means their pilot deal will disappear as well. Elaine later discusses the overrating of sex with Marla the virgin.
After finding out that George gets caught doing “that” by his mother, the gang sets the rules for the infamous “Contest,” agreeing that everyone will chip in $100 (Elaine $150), with the “master of their domain” winning it all.
George begs Susan to take him back, saying he has changed (and inadvertently calling her a soft-boiled egg). George later tells Jerry about how, upon regretting his decision, he turned to “the pick” to get out of the relationship.
Jerry gets Babu Bhatt a job at Monk’s after being partially responsible for his restaurant failing. Babu works here until he is deported after Jerry fails to give him his visa renewal papers on time.
Jerry and Elaine see Gail Cunningham at the coffee shop, where she dramatically comments on how Elaine bought her shoes from the trendy store Botticelli.
Knowing they are being eavesdropped on, Jerry and George playfully act that they are a gay couple, without realizing the eavesdropper was a reporter at NYU, whose exposé on Jerry and George “outs” them…not that there’s anything wrong with that. This is also the first appearance of Monk’s manager, Larry.
“The Old Man”
Elaine, newly minted as a volunteer for senior citizens, recruits Jerry and George to volunteer as well. Sid and Ben are later shown in the gang’s usual booth, having a similar nonsensical conversation about women.
“The Junior Mint”
Jerry and George struggle to try to guess the name of Jerry’s girlfriend, only knowing it rhymes with a female body part (“Aretha? Bovary!”).
“The Smelly Car”
George confesses that he is more attracted by Susan now that she is a lesbian, but she then meets another of George’s exes, Allison.
Elaine brings Monk’s before the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, after she is refused a job for not being large-breasted by the new Monk’s management. She later discovers all the new waitresses are sisters, daughters of the new owner.
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Elaine reveals to a stunned Jerry that she faked all orgasms with him when they were a couple.
“The Sniffing Accountant”
Jerry and Kramer grow suspicious after meeting with their accountant, Barry Prophet, after seeing him sniffing constantly when he meets them at Monk’s.
“The Lip Reader”
George’s latest girlfriend Gwen dumps him by giving you the “it’s not you, it’s me” routine, much to George’s dismay: “Nobody tells me it’s them not me, if it’s anybody it’s me!”
George asks the gang to interpret the meaning of “of course…” in relation to his interview. Elaine and Kramer criticize Enzo’s work on Jerry’s past haircuts.
George obsesses over the fact that Jerry’s masseuse girlfriend Jodi does not like him, which he discusses first with Jerry, then with his girlfriend Karen.
Jerry discusses the possible fungus Tawni may have with Elaine and Kramer. Sasha ends up breaking up with George even after his conversion, as she is moving to Latvia for a year.
Elaine discovers that Jerry’s girlfriend Jane was the woman who could not “spare a square,” so Elaine exacts revenge in the Monk’s ladies room by removing all toilet paper, and fleeing the restaurant once Jane enters a stall.
“The Marine Biologist”
George delivers perhaps the most memorable speech in the show’s history, highlighting how he, as a pretend marine biologist, miraculously saved the life of a beach whale by removing a golf ball from its blowhole.
Jerry becomes obsessed with finding out why his new girlfriend refuses to try the apple pie from Monk’s. Kramer dates Olive, a cashier at Monk’s, after he discovers her long nails cure his nagging constant back itch.
George, about to dump Daphne, decides to maintain the relationship only to spite Al Netchie, who warned Daphne that George would “hurt her.” Daphne later ends up dumping George at the coffee shop.
The manager of Monk’s, Larry, catches Jerry’s “wife” Meryl using outside syrup, to which she is sternly warned against bringing in any outside syrups, jams or condiments.
George gets asked to join Big Brothers, and spins an elaborate web of lies when he passes, claiming he needs to go to Paris instead. Jerry and Elaine try to understand Aaron’s obsession with Morty & Helen Seinfeld.
George defends his actions at the birthday party to Jerry. He later convinces Jerry to turn the tables on Toby, and go to heckle her at her office: “there’s no precedent baby!”
George employs “the opposite” philosophy, ordering the opposite lunch (chicken salad on rye, untoasted, potato salad, cup of tea), which ends up getting him a beautiful new girlfriend and a job with the New York Yankees.
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Mr. Pitt meets with Elaine for an informal interview, commenting on how much she looks like Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, and how she has the correct levels of “grace.”
“The Big Salad”
The infamous “big salad,” which George buys for Elaine (but all credit is given to his girlfriend Julie), was purchased from Monk’s.
“The Pledge Drive”
Elaine mentions to the gang how Mr. Pitt eats his candy with cutlery, noticing a new trend around the coffee shop. Jerry asks a favor of George, to bring a Yankee player to the pledge drive.
“The Chinese Woman”
George questions Frank about the mysterious man in the cape, while Frank counters with questions on why Jerry and Elaine didn’t say hello. Noreen figures out that Elaine was responsible for her and Paul breaking up.
Kramer criticizes Jerry and Elaine for putting undue stress on Poppie and landing him in the hospital. George goes to his book club, but fails miserably at discussing “Breakfast At Tiffany’s.”
Jerry and George argue about the acceptable placement of eating an eclair in the trash. Kramer reveals that his pain is being caused by a kidney stone.
George goes out with Kelly, a waitress at Monk’s, who he later discovers already has a boyfriend (who is apparently “a real watch freak”). Now uncomfortable being around her, George tries to convert the gang to going to Reggie’s, the “Bizarro coffee shop,” with disastrous results.
Jerry and George discuss George’s unusual offer of a raise for Ada, and Jerry discovers a suspicious movie ticket stub in his jacket pocket.
Jerry and George have a “reunion” with Duncan and Lois in the coffee shop, exchanging jabs at each other’s lives and careers, before Duncan set up a rematch race.
George tries to shun Jerry for even suggesting an attempt at “the switch,” claiming that “in the Middle Ages you could get locked up for even suggesting it!” Kramer later convinces Babs to quit her job and join him in a business venture.
“The Label Maker”
Jerry and George discuss George’s new girlfriend’s roommate, who George needs to get out of the picture and become the only man in Bonnie’s life.
Gary shares a secret with George, revealing he never actually had cancer, so Jerry has to “be nice” under the assumption he does not know this information. Elaine gives Mr. Lippman her glasses frames, and George debuts his toupee.
George meets Denise, a woman who turns out to be bald, and rejects HIM after he loses his toupee. Jerry asks George, “one of the most deceitful, duplicitous, deceptive minds of our time,” how to beat a polygraph test. Elaine talks about her plan to “convert” Robert to the side of heterosexuality.
“The Kiss Hello”
The gang decides to introduce Kramer to Wendy, in the hopes that he will make a comment about her dated hairstyle. George vents on Wendy’s “delicate genius” as a physical therapist.
Kramer pitches the “Bro” idea to Jerry and George, who is now petrified that he may be genetically dispossessed for breasts as well. Elaine later tells Jerry he is responsible for replacing the couch stolen under his watch, to which George tells them to take back the pee-stained couch, thus kicking out Frank from his apartment in the process.
Jerry and Elaine try to determine whether Jerry was actually violated by Tim Whatley while under anesthetic. Elaine discovers that the man who introduced her to “Jimmy” is in fact, Jimmy.
George shows Jerry and Elaine Paula’s doodle of him, a “Mr. Magoo” lookalike. Kramer takes Elaine through the Billy Mumphrey manuscript story, in the hopes Elaine will remember enough for her interview. George visits the coffee shop ensconced in velvet, much to Paula’s indifference.
“The Fusilli Jerry”
Elaine tells Jerry that he used his “move” on her, prompting Jerry to confront Puddy over putting a stop to using his patented move. Estelle tells George she is getting an eye job, as she, like George, is now “out there.”
“The Diplomat’s Club”
George shows a photo of Mr. Morgan to Jerry and Kramer, asking if they see a resemblance to Sugar Ray Leonard. Jerry tells Kramer to keep his urge to gamble in check, as he has been “clean” for over three years.
“The Face Painter”
Alec Berg gives the gang his Rangers tickets after seeing Jerry at the coffee shop. Jerry and George discuss George’s “matzah ball” of a non-returned “I love you” after Siena doesn’t reciprocate.
Elaine convinces Frank to translate Korean for him at the nail salon, and Frank “unburdens” himself by telling Elaine the lewd details of his past affair with a Korean woman.
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Sitting at Monk’s, disgusted with their lives, Jerry and George make a pact to make drastic changes in their lives and relationships. Jerry: “OUR LIVES! What kind of lives are these? We’re like children. We’re not men!” Jerry quickly breaks this pact within the episode, after dumping a woman for eating peas one at a time.
Susan tells George to “change the subject” when discussing bathroom doors going to the floor, making George seriously question his engagement. George tells Jerry that he cracked at his first postponement attempt, making Susan cry and not even getting any make-up sex.
Elaine apologizes to George for gossiping about him to Rabbi Kirschbaum. Jerry and George debate whether a security guard should have a chair, and if so, what kind. Jerry decides to look for a villa in Tuscany out of spite against the Maestro.
Jerry, George and Elaine argue about whether a blind or deaf date is better. Jerry accidentally squirts a piece of grapefruit pulp into George’s eye, leading to chaos in George’s life. The gang discovers that Elaine’s “head-to-toe” visit at James’ cost Mr. Morgan his job, and got George an unwanted promotion.
“The Hot Tub”
Elaine tells the gang that Jean-Paul is staying with her, getting pressure from Jerry to ensure he is woken up with a proper alarm clock. George tells Jerry his trick to always looking busy, and then shares his new Astros vernacular with the gang.
“The Soup Nazi”
Jerry apologizes to Sheila for choosing the Soup Nazi over her. “Inspired” by Jerry and Schmoopie, George and Susan begin similar baby-talk, leading to a baby-talk-off at the coffee shop, followed by a “make-out-off” of sorts between the two couples.
“The Secret Code”
Jerry presses George to try to have him give up his secret code. Elaine is re-introduced to Fred, who stymies her when he cannot ever recall meeting her previously.
“The Pool Guy”
Elaine and Susan become closer as girlfriends together, upsetting George that his worlds may “collide”…and they do, coming to a head when a booth at Monk’s is taken up by Jerry, Kramer, Elaine and Susan…leaving no room for him. He later dines alone at Reggie’s in disarray.
Jerry sneaks Lena’s phone number off of Kramer’s AIDS Walk donor list. Kramer tells Elaine that the sponge is off the market, sending her on a city-wide search for reserves, and sending George and Susan into looking for alternative contraception.
Kramer announces his involvement with the Alex Theater, with the help of Lloyd Braun. George accuses Monk’s cashier Ruthie Cohen of stealing his $20 bill, marked with big red lips on Andrew Jackson’s face.
Jerry and George devise the plan to sneak the marble rye back into the Ross’ townhouse, after George reveals his parents took it back upon leaving the night before.
Jerry catches George skipping out on work, where he tells Jerry he is heading to the Ross’ rebuilt cabin, as he believes actually being at work could only hurt his chances of being Assistant to the General Manager.
Jerry and George decipher the reasoning behind Christie’s potentially wearing of the identical outfit all the time. George tells Jerry that Susan is “weakening” to the name Seven.
Elaine’s friend Katy tells George that she would have set him up with her friend, Oscar-winner Marisa Tomei. George and Elaine come up with the Art Vandelay import / export cover story for Susan, to account for George’s absence with Marisa Tomei.
“The Shower Head”
Jerry has lunch with Uncle Leo, where he convinces him to be a “swinger” and ditch his current girlfriend Lydia. When his plan backfires and results in Jerry’s parents moving in with him, he meets Leo again and convinces him to take Lydia back.
Frank tells George that he is turning his old bedroom into a billiards parlor. George and Elaine are told the story of Frank’s long-lost cousin Carlo, who Elaine thinks she spotted while vacationing in Tuscany. George tries to have a meal with his mother’s doppelganger doll.
“The Friars Club”
George and Susan, now without Jerry and Hallie to enhance their conversation, are stuck in a boring discussion over shoelaces at the coffee shop.
“The Wig Master”
Elaine’s new fling, Craig, promises her a discount on clothes from his employer. Jerry gets upset when everyone begins assuming that Craig and Elaine are a couple, rather than him and Elaine being a couple.
George asks Jerry for his counsel on tip jar etiquette at Paisano’s. Todd Gack scores a date with Nicki by using his dating loophole, betting that the “M” in Richard M. Nixon stood for “Moe.”
“The Bottle Deposit”
Jerry and George dissect the lyrics of the song “Downtown,” to unlock a potential secret regarding George’s special project. Kramer steals bottles from patrons for his bottle deposit collection.
“The Wait Out”
George’s folksy “you could have done a lot better than him” remark breaks up Beth and David Lookner, with Jerry and Elaine pouncing on the rebound. David later reciprocates the comment to Susan, making her rethink her engagement to George. Jerry and Elaine devise the “I’m there for you” comment to win them Beth and David’s affection.
Jerry and Jeannie discover their mutual love of cereal…but then Jerry realizes he may have proposed in error, after realizing Jeannie seemingly eats only cereal.
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It is revealed that Jerry and Jeannie broke off their engagement at Monk’s, after both abruptly blurting out “I hate you!” in unison, and rapidly ending the relationship. Jerry also reveals that it was his suggestion to the Rosses that inspired them to start the Susan Ross Foundation, as inspired from “Star Trek II: The Wrath Of Khan.”
“The Soul Mate”
George shares his suspicion with Jerry that the Foundation thinks he killed Susan. George later dissects the tape recording with Elaine. Jerry and George suspect “Bizarro Jerry” is lying to Elaine, claiming that men would say anything for a woman (“I once told a woman that I coined the phrase ‘Pardon my French’”).
“The Bizarro Jerry”
Elaine tries to set up Jerry with “Man Hands,” George decides to use her photo with Susan’s backstory to pick up women. Elaine expresses her surprise to Jerry that Kevin just wants to be friends.
“The Little Kicks”
George invites himself to Elaine’s Peterman party, and later discovers he’s been labeled a “bad seed” by Elaine to her coworker Anna. Jerry, on George’s new “bad” title: “You’ve been the bad employee, the bad son, the bad friend, the bad finace, the bad dinner guest, the bad credit risk, the bad date, the bad sport, the bad citizen…the bad tipper!”
Elaine laments to Jerry how she is terrified of Eddie Sherman, and keeps promoting him rather than firing him. Kramer invites Jerry and Elaine to a Jewish singles night he is hosting, even though he isn’t Jewish.
After Kramer mentions his new Japanese friends and their love of TV comedy, George gets the idea to pitch the “Jerry” pilot to Japanese TV networks he deals with through the Yankees.
“The Chicken Roaster”
George tells Jerry about his “leave-behind” strategy, to ensure he can score another date with Heather. George later gloats about Heather’s follow-up with Kramer, who has now essentially turned into Jerry after switching apartments.
George, whose new-found intellect allows him to speak Portuguese, sleeps with a Portuguese waitress at Monk’s, thus resulting in his abstinence-induced intelligence being wiped out. Kramer is thrown out by Larry the manager after trying to smoke a cigar in the restaurant. Elaine’s med-student boyfriend is unable to help a patron who passes out.
“The Andrea Doria”
Elaine reveals that Alan is constantly harmed by exes because he’s a bad “breaker-upper,” as revealed when he later points out Elaine’s big head. George meets with his parents to get a grasp on his insane childhood.
“The Little Jerry”
Kramer tells Jerry that his bounced check is on display in the bodega. George announces he gets to visit a women’s prison. Kramer decides he wants to eat only cage-free, farm-fresh eggs. Elaine spots Kurt, dilapidated and depressed, over permanently going bald.
George realizes his parents are rich, but is faced with a dilemma: have them spend the money and be happy, or have them save the money and be miserable. Elaine seeks George’s advice on how to handle Morty working at J. Peterman.
George declares he is going to Ohio to zing Reilly with the “jerk store” line in person. Elaine shows Jerry a broken-hearted Vincent’s VCR play button.
“The Van Buren Boys”
Jerry consults with George to find a flaw with Ellen – but senses something is amiss when he brings his parents in to meet her, and they love her. George talks about the possibility of having Steven Koren be like George, but only for real.
George reveals his plan to have his date, Allison, “twirl” at the Yankees ball, so he can finally make a great entrance.
Jerry tells George that Jenna doesn’t know she used a toothbrush pulled from the toilet. George reveals his talking Phil Rizzuto keychain.
“The English Patient”
George is mistaken for a beautiful woman’s boyfriend, and obsesses over finding out how, even though he has won her over. Kramer becomes concerned when his Dominican rollers end up embracing Cuban revolutionary culture. Elaine gets in a fight with a waitress over “The English Patient.”
George racks his brain on how to nap in his office. Elaine discovers her mattress was custom-designed for her body type, and was not given with sexual intentions.
“The Yada Yada”
Tim Whatley announces to the gang that he’s Jewish, but Jerry is suspicious that he is angling for complete joke immunity. George’s new girlfriend repeatedly says “yada yada,” which he discovers entails a lot of major details. Elaine is berated by Beth Lookner’s new husband for wrecking their chances at adopting.
George meets with the New York Mets about a potential job as head of scouting, but imply that George would have to be fired from the Yankees first (although they never said that).
“The Muffin Tops”
Jerry discovers that George is wearing the tourist’s clothes, and George reveals to Mary Anne that he wants to “move” to New York. Elaine reveals to Mr. Lippman here, in exchange for a cut of his profits, the secret to ensuring a high quality muffin top: bake the full muffin, then “pop the top, toss the stump.”
“The Summer Of George”
George offers to work as Jerry’s relationship “assistant” to help with his demanding new girlfriend. Elaine suggests to her coworker that she swing her arms more.
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“The Butter Shave”
Upon running out of his own butter at home to lather and shave with, Kramer gets a giant tub of butter from the coffee shop. Jerry discovers that Bania is again riding his coattails, this time with his ex Jenna.
Jerry and George tell Elaine about “the voice” that mocks Claire. Jerry bets that Elaine will “backslide” into a relationship with Puddy after seeing him at the coffee shop. Thanks to Claire, Play Now is bankrupted, and George is left with no severance. Kramer sends his intern to Monk’s to take notes while he is away.
“The Serenity Now”
Patty tries to get Jerry to express his anger, and begins to get it out of him at the coffee shop…but naturally he ends up taking it too far, ending the relationship.
George noodles with combining his two passions, food and sex…and later tries to integrate television into the mix. Elaine vents about Vivian thinking she’s irresponsible, but wants out of her responsibility when told Vivian may be terminally ill.
“The Junk Mail”
Elaine meets a guy who she discovers is the pitchman for “The Wiz” – she dumps Puddy for him, but then Puddy refuses to take her back later. George devises his plan so his parents will catch him “dating” his cousin.
“The Merv Griffin Show”
Jerry laments on his new girlfriend’s amazing toy collection, and agrees to bring George and Elaine to play with them. George debates humanity’s “deal” with pigeons, after running over a squirrel and having to nurse it back to health. Elaine laments on a “sidler” in her office, and how to handle him.
George tells Jerry and Kramer about “the boombox incident,” and help him devise a plan to steal Kruger’s photo and retouch himself out of it.
Flashbacks reveal that Elaine first introduced the groom, Pinter (then he went by “Peter”) to the gang at Monk’s years earlier, before they broke up and he met Sue Ellen Mischke.
George tells Jerry and Elaine about the Jason Hanke neckhole story, and is livid when he gets only a sarcastic apology from Hanke, now a recovering alcoholic. George meets Hanke’s sponsor to complain, but ends up being taken to a Rageaholics Anonymous meeting instead.
The gang discovers George’s “heritage” when Elaine finds a Festivus card for George, after which Frank enters Monk’s to formally invite George for Festivus. Jerry attempts to take his girlfriend Gwen only to the coffee shop, as she is a “two-face” who seemingly only looks good in the light of Monk’s back booth.
“The Reverse Peephole”
George chides Jerry for not carrying a wallet, but Jerry turns the tables when he sees George’s enormous wallet. Elaine complains about having to replace Joe Mayo’s coat, the same as Puddy’s “Dr. Zaius” fur.
Jerry convinces Sally to stay in show business, but it backfires when she starts a one-woman show mocking Jerry. Kramer breaks his vow of silence to Sally, giving her more details about Jerry’s life. Elaine gets Jerry and George to help her understand the latest “New Yorker” cartoon.
George devises a plan to date two women simultaneously, so that he will have a valid reason for his first girlfriend to dump him. They all meet at the coffee shop, but want to both continue seeing George. Elaine questions how to end her relationship with the “got-no-Green Lantern.”
Jerry shows off his Wizard, a birthday gift for Morty. The gang discusses whether Elaine’s new boyfriend is black, as their possible “interracial” relationship leads to further confusion. The Rosses spot George and Elaine at the coffee shop, when he was supposed to be at “his house” in The Hamptons.
Jerry and George decipher what the “tractor story” could mean. Elaine reveals her confusion over Puddy being a religious Christian, but is upset when he tells her she is going to hell. George catches Mr. Kruger skipping out on work.
Jerry confronts Uncle Leo for stealing books, and is later shunned by him after turning him in. Elaine reveals her embarrassing office makeout story. George complains about having to buy a “flagged” book, and outlines his scheme to return it. He later tries selling it to Elaine, before Jerry reveals the truth of its beginnings.
George announces he’s buying the Frogger machine, but doesn’t know how to keep it plugged in. He consults with Kramer and his “friends” Shlomo and Slippery Pete to organize the electrical transfer. Kramer suggests Elaine try replacing the Windsor cake with an Entemann’s.
For the first time in the series, the gang is forced to sit at the counter. General confusion over the conversation ensues, with a giant game of broken telephone resulting in Elaine’s new phone number translating to news of Newman’s death.
Monk’s final appearance of the series. The gang meets one last time, where they discuss where to use NBC’s private jet to spend one last “fling” together before Jerry and George move to California.
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Curb Your Enthusiasm
Monk’s Café appears multiple times in the reunion episode, with George discovering that his ex-wife did not lose any money to Bernie Madoff, and the episode ending with George revealing to the gang that he had to sign a pre-nup with his ex-wife.
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Jerry and George go for a halftime cup of coffee (at the REAL New York location of Tom’s), where George discovers that Jerry invited George over for the game only because George’s prior “over-cheering” got them banned from a legitimate Super Bowl party. The Pacer later stalls outside the coffee shop, leaving them stranded in the snow.